The Last Samurai
Posted by erin at December 9, 2003 11:16 AMMe: The pain of this film is too much to bear. The director should commit seppuku.
N.: No, he can't, because he can't find his wakazashi under his GIANT PILE OF MONEY.
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December 9, 2003 12:32 PM, Maggie said:
Suckers! Instead, I watched "The Samurai", a documentary on the History channel last night. I'm assuming it's 10000 times better. (But weirdly enough they had ads for "The Last Samurai" during commercial breaks of the documentary).
December 9, 2003 01:02 PM, N. said:
Yes, what a coincidence. Almost like it was planned.
I caught some of the documentary as well. Can't really watch those because of all the ridiculous hand-held DV stock footage of guys in costume.
Seriously, though, TLS was eye-gougingly bad. Stay away. Joe-Bob says, 'call in sick.'
December 9, 2003 03:39 PM, anthony said:
The History Channel documentary wasn't all that great, either. But the target audience is probably the same people who'll think The Last Samurai is a great movie.
IFC shows old samurai movies every Saturday - last week they even aired the Musashi trilogy by Hiroshi Inagaki, and starring Toshirô Mifune.
December 9, 2003 03:51 PM, Erin said:
Everytime I try to watch IFC's Samurai Saturday its the same movie about the bling samurai guy.
Anyway, TLS isn't "eye-gougingly" bad, because the cinematography is quite good. Tom Cruise is horrible, and some of the dialog is ear-stabbing bad, but I wouldn't gouge my eyes, necessarily.
December 9, 2003 04:46 PM, anthony said:
Well, it's the same cinematographer as Legends of the Fall and Braveheart, so I expect it is rather pretty if nothing else.
Tim Burton's Big Fish is worth seeing - I believe that it is officially released tomorrow.
December 10, 2003 01:52 AM, Halifax said:
If the director can't find his wakazashi, he should just whistle for Scout, because on its back he's sure to find his tanto.
December 10, 2003 12:31 PM, Phil said:
Wow. I haven't seen TLS yet, but I assumed it'd be at least decent, since Edward Zwick directed Glory (Best exploding watermelon movie ever!) and Courage Under Fire.
December 10, 2003 01:07 PM, Erin said:
Well, I'm sure that if you don't know anything about acting, history, or Japan, TLS is probably a fine movie.
It would probably help if you didn't speak much English (or Japanese), too, that way, you'd miss the really bad dialog. (Only one third of the dialog was real, real, bad. One third was good and the other third was OK.)
December 12, 2003 09:25 AM, ali said:
*clings to Katsumoto*
December 16, 2003 01:19 PM, said:
i know an unfortunately low amount of japanese history, and i have an unusually high tolerance for bad bad dialogue, particularly (strangely) when its tom cruise...so i actually enjoyed TLS quite alot.
it was like Samurai fan-fic.
i liked the fight scenes....
but it was deplorabe that the japanese was so poorly translated. wtf? its a movie for people who speak english, but the subtitles really didnt say what the japanese actually said. ok that was vague, but heh.
December 16, 2003 01:21 PM, rose said:
that last one was me. oops.
i think it'd be awesome if all bad directors had enough of a sense of shame to commit seppuku. chis columbus would have been a Goner.
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